NO bake NO cooking Egg-less Swiss Roll Cake !!! 15 Minutes Recipe

Swiss roll is an easy, quick and delicious recipe. It is a NO bake and NO cooking recipe and only needs to be refrigerated for 3-4 hours. Homemade cake is thousand times better than the outside cake. Swiss roll is an ideal recipe for any birthday party or any get together party where not only the kids even the elders will love this snack. The secret story of this cake is that while it looks like it would be hard to make, it’s actually pretty easy. 

Adopt paraben free life for your baby

Today, when I was bathing my 2 year old with a herbal scrub, I happened to read the ingredients at the back of the bottle. It mentioned Paraben. It shocked me as it being a herbal product, it should not have such things. I was not sure of what harms does Paraben occur but I was sure that it is harmful. I searched on the internet and came to know that studies indicate that Paraben might cause cancer. I decided not to use such products on my baby and hence, adopted cleaning ingredients from my kitchen for her. Here are some of them that you mothers can use:

Gram Flour
This is my favourite. I mix gram flour with fresh milk or curd. A few drops of lemon and turmeric and the babyscrub is ready. In summers, she likes this chilled mix and enjoys the bath.

Bread Scrub
You need some fresh bread slices. Scramble them. Mix it with milk and scrub the baby's body with it. Make sure that the bread is fresh and not beyond the expired date.

Oatmeal
Use some oatmeal powder or grind the oat flakes. Add fresh milk. It's good for weekly cleansing.

Rose water
Add few drops of rose water to any scrub or cleansing mix you prepare. Your baby might love the smell and you will love the fresh feeling of the same. Rose water is especially recommended in winters to keep the moisture of the skin intact.

Masoor Dal
What?? You might be surprised right. Masoor dal is actually good for the natural glow on the skin, they say. Add some milk and sandal powder to ground masoor daal.

A Delicious Interview with a Doting Mother

Things change post wedding they say. However, I believe things actually change post a baby. Meet Shruti Kahdoriya Sheth, who a jewelry designer by profession and a baker by passion transformed into a doting mother.

Heyya Shruti!!!
How's your 2-year old Aayansh?
He's doing great, growing up day by day. 

Has he joined school yet?
Yes. He has. However, still not settled, yet he is nearly reaching there. 

So, you love cooking. How has cooking changed after motherhood?
Yes, I love cooking. After Aayansh, I am more focused on nutrition and wholesome food. One more change that I did after having Aayansh is that I started looking for one meal one dish kind of preparations. This gives me more time with Aayansh rather than slogging out in kitchen. 

What will you cook up quickly in the kitchen?
Gujarati meals like Veg Handvo, Muthiya, Veg Khichdi or Veg Pulao. Marathi meals like Sev Ussal. I also like preparing Wheat bread Coleslaw sandwich or Veg Roti Wrap.

What is the big challenge you face in the kitchen?
To make recipes that not only excites my kid but are also very healthy and wholesome. For instance, he like having noodles. This made me churn up wheat based noodles at home. Based on his mood, I prepare either sweet or savory. And he loves them too.

What is your lunch like? What do you pack in the tiffin for the man of the house?
Being a foodie just like me, he likes complete meal in lunch like chapati, sabzi, dal (occasionally) and curd or buttermilk. For evening, I usually pack fruits or khakhra.

Is your kiddo demanding when it comes to food?
Yes, but not often. He follows a few patterns that I have understood quite well. Weekends are always full of demands for Pizza or Dosa. However, he accepts his regular food as well. Usually, he likes having Veg Poha in the evening.

Which recipe you remember from your childhood?
Veg Khichadi - its easy to prepare and quite nutritious. I started cooking at an early age and by the time I turned 12, I had learnt to prepare several basic dishes.

A food memory from your childhood
When I was in 8th standard, I decided to prepare something for my dad's birthday as my mom was not in town. I dished up gulabjamuns that came out quite well and even earned me appreciation.

Your maa ke haath ka khana
Simply Yum! She makes real delicious dishes. Dahiwada, Pav Bhaji, Biryani are some of the heavenly dishes I crave for, especially on weekends. The taste still lingers on my tongue.

Food that makes your mouth water
Well, being a foodie, I have tasted a variety of things around the world. However, my favourites are Maa ke haath ka baingan ka bharta and udad daal teamed up with Bajre ki roti. Surti Undhiyon makes my mouth water. I love the traditional Kathiyawadi dishes prepared at my place. When it comes to sweet, I love gorging on churman ka laddoo, Sheera, Malpua and Kheer.

Did your in-laws family bring a change in the taste of your cooking?
Yes, a drastic one, I should say. They prefer Gujarati taste while mine is a complete Kathiyawadi. Our and their food habits differ but now, my food is prepared in both the styles, when required.

A restaurant you will never forget
Burger King of Bangkok and Ganesha from Indonesia. I am emotionally attached to these.
In Ahmedabad, 9-Apple South Leaf, a South Indian restaurant. Being close to our home, we often visit it for its delicious preparations.

Your non-food passions
Travelling and understanding cultures of different places.

Your all-time favorite cuisine
Kathiyawadi, Mexican and Lebanese

Thank you for giving a peek into your lifestyle, Shruti!!! Nice having you on our blog. 

From being just a dentist to a Mommy dentist!

Dentists. The word makes us (mommies) sit up and take notice. In this age when one of the meals of most of the kids have chocolates, we are quite worried about cavities, a la Colgate Toothpaste ad. So, I decided to interview one of the mommies who is also a dentist. Let's meet Pradnya Madkaiker Ajmera, who is a potpourri of Goan, Maharashtrian, Rajasthani and Gujarati culture. 

How old is your baby? What's her name?

Saumya will complete 2 years in August. 

Tell us about your life after motherhood. 

My work needs dedicated hours of practice, just like a baby does. As a professional and as a mother, I am still learning and progressing towards perfection.

How was working during pregnancy?

Working was more of a challenge and not a necessity. It was both fun and exciting with all those weird changes taking place in the body and of course, hormonal imbalances. Also, being a dentist had its drawbacks as I had to be very cautious about X-ray radiations. With frequent episodes of nausea and vomiting, I was almost on the verge of quitting, but kept on going with motivation and support. Disbelievingly, I worked up to 7 months of pregnancy. 

When did you resume work after delivery?

After a break of almost 18 months as I strictly wanted to breastfeed my kiddo and see her growing up. I wanted to be with her while she covers her every milestone. It's mesmerizing to see the baby crawl, stand-up, speak her first word. Those 18 months are the best phase of my motherhood. 

As a mother, what measures do you take?

I follow very basic measures of safety and nutrition for my baby. I have made my home and room child safe. I have learnt preparing a lot of healthy tasty dishes. I teach her to be independent. 

How does Saumya take your being away from home?

To my surprise, she responds very positively and calmly. She has understood my routine and never makes fuss or shows tantrums. She knows exactly when she needs to do or ask for something. What else could I have asked of from her!

What things should kid avoid?

Being a dentist, I feel anything in excess has to be avoided. Healthy food and eating habits should be inculcated as soon as a mother starts weaning. I strongly recommend to avoid packaged drinks and food, too much sweet and sticky foods. Also too much exposure to electronic devices.

How soon should babies start brushing?

Brushing should begin as soon as you those first cute teeth popping out. Use finger brush with mild pressure initially and then baby brush accordingly. Toothpaste needs to be avoided till the child understands to spit out completely. Tongue cleaning is equally important. Use gauze wrapped around your finger to clean tongue. Best is to avoid tongue cleaners till 3 years of age. Make a habit of brushing twice every day. Visit dentist every 6 months to eliminate any fear of doctor from the kid's mind.

How do you balance work and baby?

It becomes difficult at times to manage baby and home and clinic. But I want my daughter to understand that this is life. We need to be patient and hopeful. Every day when she waves me goodbye with a sweet kiss on my cheek, I am delighted by the sparkle in her eyes. 

How do you inspire Saumya as a working mother?

It is not me but she who inspire me to keep going. 

How does your husband and in-laws support you?

They make my life complete. They have been a constant support throughout, be it pregnancy or early days of motherhood. Without them, I would not have been able to give Saumya a family life wherein she enjoys bonding, sharing, family values, elderly love and affection. All this has made me more receptive and adaptive to the drastic changes that have happened post pregnancy. A big thanks to them for being there. 

When a Foodie turns into a Cook

Ask any foodie about the best food he or she ever had and pat will come the reply, "Maa ke haath ka khana". Now, you are thinking that how come every mother is the best cook in the world. I think a mother cultivates the habit of cooking good food for their babies. They make sure that the spices are balanced, nutrition is right and temperature just as the baby likes it. My husband once complemented me saying "You have become a better cook after becoming a mother". I bring to you a story of a woman who learnt so many dishes after motherhood, in spite of the fact that she did not like cooking earlier. Meet Dharti, mother of 2-year old Dhiti. She has tried everything for her kiddo, right from baking fruit breads and cookies to churning up delicious ice-creams. Psst...She even inspired me to bake cookies and even carry a meal-box while visiting restaurants :)

Heyyya Dharti!!!
I have seen you transform from a newbie mother to a full-on mommy. It's great!!

How has motherhood changed you?
I can get up in the middle of night and cook, if Dhiti gets up and says "mumma khau che" :) I never imagined myself like this because I love my sleep a lot and  cooking was the last thing I could think of worth doing.

What is your main focus as a mother?
I want my daughter to be happy, healthy and a positive person.

You were not that much into cooking earlier. What influenced you to cook for Dhiti?
Dhiti is underweight and also a picky eater so my first priority is to give her nutritious and wholesome meal. Secondly, she being underweight we can't afford her to fall ill and loose any further weight. So me and my husband Jaimin made it a point to develop her good eating habits and what is better than home cooked food. This concern for her transformed me into fair cook from a miserable one! :)

You have not exposed Dhiti to preservatives in food. You make sure you cook for her. Reasons?
I am just trying to give Dhiti a healthy lifestyle during her present formative years.  However, once she starts understanding then she will be free to decide about her dietary choices.  We have come across multiple instances wherein children who do not have healthy eating habits encounter numerous problems later on right from low immunity, obesity, blood pressure etc.

Dhiti is just 2 years old. I think that when I can cook  food with fresh  ingredients then why should I give her food with preservatives. Believe me, its not that tough at all I could find plenty of blogs and ideas by some simple googling.

When you travel, you pack foods for your lil one. Our readers would like to know what could be packed? 
We started with a road trip when Dhiti was 11 months old, I remember carrying a hand grinder cum blender with me!!!  -You will be amazed that I even carried all masalas in small packets so that I don't have to use those in hotel !!

- Being a gujju thepla is a must.:) It also has a good shelf life.
- Churma laddoo with jaggery can be good choice for energy requirement. One laddoo per day is fine.

- Khajoor and dry fruits laddoo

- processed Cheese cubes

- Home made wheat bread (its really easy) 

- Corn (you can store boiled corn in freezer, microwave it with butter and salt pepper.)

- Dry bengal gram chutney to go with Idli or Dosa

- Masala puris fried in Ghee

- Mamra

- Home-made wheat or ragi biscuits 

- Home made wheat based chocolate cake

- Home made cerelac (http://itsybitsymom.blogspot.in/search/label/Recipe)

- Ragi atta

- Fruits

- Dry fruits

If hotels open the kitchen allowing you cook for lil one, what equipment could be carried?

I have traveled thrice with Dhiti till date but I was amazed to see that all hotels allow using their kitchen if that is for a kid.  

I take one small kadai, small microwave bowl, knife, peeler, spoon, small plate

What can be cooked here? (in relation to above)

Khichadi, roti, rice, dal, daliya, porridges, soup 

Last time after she turned 2, when I traveled I allowed her to eat the hotel food such as dal khichadi, dal, rice, poha, upma, idli. I do not see any harm if the food is freshly prepared, non spicy and served hot. 

What will you dish up quickly when you enter kitchen?

-- Moong dal and bhakhri

Your maa ke haath ka khana is 

--- bliss

Your funniest memory of food...

(Laughs) I think i have told you about this. Jaimin( my husband) is very finicky about eating at someone's place. If he sees untidy kitchen then he will never eat there. So this was before marriage he was coming to meet me at my rented apartment. So excited me got up early in the morning, cleaned the house(including fans), prepared food. I made bhindi that day. I had cleaned the bhindi properly and then cut it but then I thought let me clean it again just to be extra sure. I cooked that bhindi which came out to be sticky unaware of the fact it happened because of me washing it again after cutting it. Still I made him eat that bhindi. So this was my first impression and display of my cooking skills.

Your all-time favourite cuisine

--- It used to be punjabi cuisine but now its everything with fresh ingredients except Thai Green Curry.

Your non-food passions

-- Dancing.. I know classical dance Bharat Natyam, I have done basic and advance course in Salsa, hip hop and Jive. But out of all folk dance is my favorite as it is full of expressions.

It was great hearing from you Dharti. Readers, who would like to ask her any questions about recipe can comment below. She will be more than happy to answer it. 

So says the mommy of a lil soldier!!

Readers!!! I have promised you interesting posts that let you have a peek into the lives of different parents. So, here I am with an interview of a girl who suddenly transformed into a lady post wedding. Yes, she is a wife of a soldier, mommy of a 8 month old boy, writer by profession, painter by passion, cook by compulsion and what not. Let's begin!!!

What's the name of your baby, Apoorva? How old is he?
Rishaan, meaning a good human being, has just turned 8 months old. 

It's great to be a mother. How has motherhood changed you?
Motherhood was a complete re-birth for me. Not just my body, but my soul took a rebirth too. I have learned to be patient, first of all. They say, I have become all the more responsible too. A multi-tasker is the first quality that a mother must possess, so here I am. I can say that there comes a time that I even forget to breathe, but the smile on my little one's face rejuvenates me with all the happiness and positivity. 

Does the equation between a couple change after babyhood?
Certainly, it does, but only for the better. We are a stronger couple now. 

How does it feel being a wife of an army man?
Getting married to an Olive Green is a big responsibility, a thought which didn't even cross my mind when the preparations were going on. I was just a fresher out of college and suddenly, I was expected to behave all 'ladylike'. I would say that the wife of a soldier is as much a part of the army. We actually have our set of tasks and responsibilities that needs to be taken care of. There are unsaid protocols and rules for army wives and I make sure that I follow them. It's a blessing to be a soldier's wife. 

So, what is your day like?
I do a lot of things. I even cook. I say this because I was never into cooking. However, having hosted several parties which required me to cook for around 20 people at one go, has transformed me. I learnt so many things. I love to experiment with food (thanks to YouTube for being there). 

Then, I am an art lover and painting is what keeps me alive. Whenever time is on my side, I grab a brush and paint my mind. It is soothing. 

After having Rishaan, my love for writing took an all new turn. I am writing letters to my lil one, maintained a diary for him. Herein I teach him how to deal with different kinds of problems (God forbids) in the right manner; how to 'be yourself' in the fast changing world and many other things. I hope that he reads these letters when he grows up when he has a bunch of responsibilities on his shoulder.

And I even write professionally. Working from home isn't as easy as it seems from the other side.

Writing is refreshing. Isn't it?  
Writing for self helps me bring out my emotions. There comes a time when you need someone to talk to, when you have nobody around, or maybe when you feel people who would understand you are not present at the moment. Writing at this time helps me pour down my thoughts. Writing professionally helps me connect with people. I would say that because of my writing I got to befriend many people and this is an amazing feeling.  

What motivates you? Money or something else?
Honestly, it feels good to see your bank balance growing (winks) But, more than that it gives me immense confidence and sense of self dependence when I work. 

Is your family supportive?
Indeed. Else, I would not have reached where I am today!

Once Rishaan starts going to school, would you prefer joining an office full time?
If I get an opportunity, I would definitely love to join full time office but only in the field of writing.

What are your hobbies?
Dancing! I love to dance like crazy. It recharges me even in the bluest of times. Painting and writing (of course) 

You married quite early and had a baby too. Many girls prefer settling down early. People say it helps to build a better bond with the baby. What's your take?
My wedding happened in a very short span of time. I had to choose between career and family and I chose the latter, being high on emotional quotient. I desired to give complete attention to my baby. I want to see him blossom into a handsome man and a good human being, just like his name. If a baby is planned early, it helps on various fronts. As he grows up, I would get time to settle down into my career too. Sooner or later, every mother shares an equally strong bond with the baby, irrespective of the time they have them. 

Last but not the least, when are you coming to Ahmedabad?
'Keri nu ras' is calling me! And that's one of the many good things I love about Ahmedabad. Whenever I come I would love to relish some handmade Gujarati delicacies at your place for sure.

Haha, it was nice hearing from you, Apoorva. 
Thanks for letting me have a say. It's a nice feeling being interviewed. 

A slice of life of a Vlogger Mommy

Every mommy wears multiple hats day in and out. She is a cook, cleaner, feeder, entertainer, and even goes to office or works from home. She is one-point contact for the kid, no matter how many people the kid is surrounded by. Here is one such mommy that I know of. She left her corporate designation and became a full-time mommy, only to discover her love for vlogging.

Heyya Neha!!! Let's begin.

How old is Vedanshi now?
She is old enough to call me mumma (smiles). 

Oh! She has started talking. Wow, isn't it? 
It is. She began talking just a few months back. We call her 'Veda'. She is the heartbeat of our family and as sweet as any toddler can be. 

I love your smile. It has a sense of satisfaction. 
Just like every other bride, it took me time to settle in. Having a baby made me realize the feelings of my parents-in-law towards me. Being a mother is the toughest job. There are no working hours, just a long 24 x 7 routine. 

What was the biggest challenge?
The biggest challenge for me was to make sure that my picky eater gets all the healthy nutrients. I made sure that the food is interesting not only for the baby but for the entire family as well. 

So, this made you begin a food channel?
To an extent yes. This channel will make sure that your dinner table has a variety of foods from different cultures. 

You named it 'Reet'. What does it mean?
'Reet' is a Hindi word meaning tradition. Every culture follows a tradition while performing routine activities. We have added 'Foodelicious' - a fusion touch to the channel as well. While preparing food, it is necessary to stay connected to the roots and at the same time make it more interesting by adding a zing. 

How will you make your recipes appealing?
We Indians are so fond of food that there are so many varieties of a single recipe. And that is the reason that the way to an Indian's heart takes a long way through the stomach (winks). I will make sure that with the approach of every festival, I add festive recipes that are healthy. Being an important part of lifestyle, food equalizes festival too. For instance, Makar Sankranti means gorging on Ghewar, Holi means relishing Gujiyas, Krishna Janmashtmi stands for eating Dhaniya Panjiri, come Ganesh Jayanti and we start preparing laddoos - it is a never-ending list. 

Who would you like to give the credit for this channel?
My mothers. Weddings are such a lovely thing - they gift us an extra mother. I will definitely give the credit for 'Reet' to my mom and mother-in-law, the two important pillars of my life. My mother-in-law has been contributing to this channel emotionally, mentally, physically while my mother is an invisible support, sending me blessings from heaven.

Tell us more about your mothers' personalities and how they have contributed yours. 
My mother-in-law is an extremely talented person. I am thankful to God for making me meet her. She knows everything, right from cooking, stitching, painting, embroidery to even writing and singing. For almost 20 years, she helmed a workshop of embroidery in Kanpur. However, when she arrived in Mumbai, she ditched her dream and became a full-time homemaker, which is again a tough job. I dedicate this channel to her, the role model of my life. 

My mother was a working woman, a government teacher, who inspired us to balance both work and family. At times, I felt bad when my friends' mothers was present at home to welcome and hug them on return from school. I was naive and even fought with her to be at home, at least, for lunch time as I missed her very much. My mother made me understand how important is her job for the family and that she misses me equally. Now she is not alive but after being a mother, I realized that she worked for us, to give us a better life. She is my inner strength and always will be. I am very proud of being her daughter. 

Will your past experiences change you as a mother?

Yes, very much. I am a privileged mother that I can work from home. I want to be with my baby, want to welcome her when she returns from school or college. 

Is it important for a mother to be working?

I think yes. If you are educated and doing just one thing - handling your home, people think that you are not courageous enough to do a job or earn money. 

How will working from home help?

The YouTube channel will give both me and my mother-in-law a motto, an inspiration to do something creative every day. The primary objective is to instill confidence in my mother-in-law and many such women who left their dream careers for their family. With the advent of internet, a woman can do so many more things together. 

Do you miss your earlier work?

As a matter of fact, I do. This is because working at an office was comparatively easy. Not many understand what a woman goes through when she leaves her job and sacrifices so many pleasures for her family. The word 'homemaker' is so meaningful - without a home-maker, there is no home. With this, I do not mean that it is easy for a person to work at office; that too requires sacrifices. 

Do you want to inspire your daughter with your work?

Very much. I want her to stand for her own self and become an independent personality. Like my mother worked in spite of facing hardships, I want her to follow her own heart and not give in to temporary pleasures. 

How motherhood has transformed you?

After giving birth to Veda, I became stronger and smarter. Now, I have learnt to utilize the available resources in the best possible manner for my baby. My baby needs me now. I want to enjoy her childhood and see her nurture like a flower. With every passing day, she is adding something to my personality. I feel like I am a kid again, a learner. 

What would you like to change if you could?

The sentence I told my mother to be at home, when I return from school. But, I will make sure that I never hear something like this from my baby.

Where do you see yourself after 5 years?

As a volgger, I don't know what will I be doing after 5 months or 5 years. But, I am sure of giving 100 percent to everything that I am interested in. As of now, both 'Veda' and 'Reet' are my babies. 

We didn't talk about your husband.

Varun is force that has been present throughout. In fact, he inspired me to don the hat of a vlogger. He completes me as a mother. 

Thank you Neha for letting out your heart on this blog. 

In fact, I should thank you Urvashi for giving me an opportunity to share my feelings. 

Style File of a two-year old

Since pregnancy, many mommies start dressing up in a different manner. Some become fashionistas, while others lose all the interest... I think this is all due to introduction of a new batch of hormones I think. With the birth of my daughter, my interest in dressing up took a new turn.

Initially, i was recycling my old stuff. But now, my two year old asks me to dress up.
"What will you wear today?" she inquires.
 Her second question is "What shall I wear?"
And when I give her a tee, she asks me, "What shall I team up with this?"
"Oh Gawd!!!" is what I exclaim.

However, I am glad that she likes dressing up. My father is of the opinion that a person's first impression is that of the clothes and second is that of her language. Clothes need not be expensive but they should be able to present you well.

On the lines of the fashion interviews I read, I interviewed myself. I waited for someone to interview me for fashion but eventually, I did the honors. Here is an excerpt (they say)....

This is my interview.... next to it is my daughter's

Fashion to me is
Looking good to inspire my daughter

One word that describes me
Bubbly

As a person I have become
Active and informed

My style
Colorful and comfortable

One thing that makes me feel sexy
Halter-neck

Must-have things for wardrobe
A sexy frock, colorful pyjamas, wrap-around skirt
and different stoles to pep up any outfit

Three things I never leave home without
Cellphone, wallet and keys
And yes, water bottle for my kiddo

A priceless possession I'll never want to give away
A golden deer from my mom's jewelry box

My ideal outfit for

A fun party
Floral frock with big earrings

A formal work setting
Ankle length pants with puffed sleeves shirt

A casual day out
Shorts paired with flowy top

Date (with husband)
Knee-length skirt, beautiful top paired with ear-studs

A fashion trend I cannot stand
Animal prints

These were my answers, now read what my two year old would have answered to this

Fashion to me is
Wearing denims

One word that describes me
Drama Queen

As a person I have become
Talkative and understanding

My style
Casual

One thing that makes me feel sexy
I am too young to understand what 'sexy' means

Must-have things for wardrobe
Denims, tees, an ethnic skirt and lots of shoes to go with all of them

Three things I never leave home without
Momma, water bottle and vehicle keys (if i want a ride)

A priceless possession I'll never want to give away
My denims

My ideal outfit for

A fun party
Denim shorts

A formal work setting
Are denims allowed? Better, am I allowed to work?

A casual day out
Denim pants

A family gathering
My momma makes me wear ethnic skirts

Play-date
Jumpsuits (coz i am made to wear diaper)

A fashion trend I cannot stand
Frocks (who invented them)

My fashion icon
My maternal aunt (she sports every look quite right, guys)

Is unisex upbringing on your mind??

"Pink!!!! Pink is my favorite color!" exclaimed my one and a half year old girl!!
And poof! all my dreams of unisex upbringing or what they call in the West, 'Gender neutral upbringing' vanished in thin air.

Yeah, pink is a lovely color. See, my blog has a tinge of pink and it gives it a happening look. But, should this color be associated just with feminism?

I never discriminated between frocks and jumpsuits, nor did I bought the newly loved pink suitcases for my lil daughter. I gave her blocks to play and asked her to hit the football with the boys. But there she is, standing in front of me, recognizing her favorite color among a slew of others. This made me thinking. Oh! I understand, now Pink is the favorite color of boys too and that might be the reason she liked it.

Whatever reasoning I gave, my heart came to understand that girls indeed are different. I have so many friends, who have kids my daughter's age. When we chat, we come to know that boys indeed like cars and trucks, while girls jump towards things that could be arranged. While boys play by hugging and hitting each other, girls smile and wink and jump together.

My fellow-mommies have decided to bring their kids in a neutral manner. But, their experience with their kids was a completely different thing, especially those who have boys. They say that their boys do not gel with little girls. They are hesitant to share their toys and even pull their hair. While they are okay with sharing them with boys and enjoy the hitting game. One of my friends, Ami, remarked that her little boy behaves well with my daughter but the moment there was a boy at her place, he behaved in a completely boy-ish manner.

So, how should I groom my daughter, was my question! My confusion was quadrupled when my maid uttered these words one day. "Isko t-shirt-pant nahin pehanao didi!" said my maid. I reasoned and she was of the opinion that my baby would have a habit of behaving like boys, dressing up like them, talking in their language and stuff. I was amused but it was a food for thought for me.

After reading articles, i understood that there is a fine line that should not be crossed. I had decided upon unisex upbringing, which does not mean that I cannot make her wear dresses, nor will I make her play with trucks all the time. I will do everything that mothers of boys do and also that of girls. My idea of upbringing is to let her decide what she wants to be like, a boy or a girl. I do not want to make my kiddo a feminist, though. I want to make her a tough girl, who can do everything that boys do, and still be called a woman of mettle.

My lil one is two-year old now. She does not shy away from boys, she plays even with the elder ones. She talks to everyone, in fact, she initiates conversations at times, just like I do. The one thing that I like about her, at present, is that she does not allow anyone to touch her. However much we think about neutral upbringing, girls will remain girls, and it is required that they learn protecting themselves, whether they are in India or in a country, seven seas across. 

Make way!!! New-Age Nani is here

"Oh!!! you like this video! let me save this offline, for you!!! Says the Nani of my two year old.

I had a pre-conceived notion that taking my toddler to nani will bring a change in her habits. Instead of videos, she will play with nani, she will learn some bhajans along with rhymes and what nots. All this vanished when i witnessed the new-age nani. My toddler loved the way nani made her play games on the tab and nanu fulfilled her every wish. Move over the old age nanis who used to make aamras and pickles for you. This new-age nani says, "Let's have a fanta float" or a slice of pizza at the new outlet!

I faintly remember our summer holiday trips to Nani's place. Firstly, our nani stayed far away. This 'far away' seemed way too far away as our mommies towed us in railways rather than flights, the mode we prefer for our kids these days. The journey to our nani's place itself was fun. When we reached there, the joy of hugging nani after a long journey and after a long time cannot be described here in words. She used to wait with bated breaths for us. The first line always used to be, "Kitni badi ho gayi hai" And for us our nani seemed a little old every time. There were no whatsapps, video calls or anything for nani to see us growing. Every summer, we grew up a little for her. With so many cousins, it was always a huge get-together and so much fun. We had to share our toys and play together. We learnt to eat all kinds of veggies and fruits as that's what nani had prepared for everyone. (And my mother prepares what my toddler likes, so that there is no fuss)

Visits to the temples, giving grains to birds and reading holy books was a natural thing at Nani's place. These days, there is a huge shopping list and visit to the malls during holidays. I am still pampered by my nani. But, both of us are more materialistic now. Because, this is the way we have learnt to measure love. In spite of so many changes, some things have not changed like 'pampering' 'binging on food' and 'lots of love'. The method of pampering has changed, though.

However, one thing that i love in new-age nanis is that they are open to change. While they love flaunting their iPads to their grandkids, they even take them to temples. Their is a fine balance they have embraced and no-one's complaining.

But, even now, i yearn to take my toddler to the good old summer holidays - when there was no screen-time, just face-to-face time playing dark room, hide-n-seek and so many games. Talking of games, we used to play so many of them... Wait, that will be a new topic altogether...some other day. For now, let me surprise my nani, not with gifts, but a visit with my little one. She will be more than just happy!!

Wean!! Wean!! Wean!!!

"So, how old is she" chirped a mommy.
"She will be two, next week" i smiled
"Are you still breastfeeding her" she asked the familiar question
"Yes, why not?"
"Ohh, i would feel so odd feeding such a grown-up baby"

And this was the line that inspired me to write this.

Breastfeeding is such a beautiful thing. It brings my baby close to me. She looks for me when she wants to feed, she caresses me and gives me that heavenly smile. I am satiated with the content on her face. I know so many mothers who were not able to breastfeed their babies and always told me, please do not stop breastfeeding early. And I even know so many other mothers who asked me to stop breastfeeding after my baby turns one.

There are so many presumptions when it comes to breastfeeding. I respect my mom-in-law who always gave me invaluable parenting advice. She told me to feed as long as the child wants to. This will make sure that the baby is protected from all kinds of diseases that float around. One of my other friends advised me that if i am staying at home to bring up my baby, why should i not breastfeed for at least two years. 

I am a mother who keeps on talking to other mothers to know about their style of upbringing. I am pleasantly surprised that a great number of mothers have chucked their flourishing careers and now stay at home, just to bring their kids up in the best manner possible. And they are not from a very well to do family. These mothers just want that their babies grow up into good human beings. They do not want that their kids repent their childhood, saying that their mother was not available to them. 

When I consulted my husband regarding weaning because i was tired, he asked me to breastfeed for at least two years. He gave me a valuable piece of advice that breastfeeding for two years will prevent me from breast cancer. One thing that he told me changed my perspective forever. My husband being into corporate communication at a hospital, told me that he has been to the cancer ward of the hospital and found people who had no hope of living.  And whenever i felt like weaning in between, i should visit the cancer ward and stay there for some time to respect the convenience that God has given me.

As compared to this, i am disgusted to see mothers who just want to wean their babies as they cross the one year mark. Such mothers generally have been conditioned in this manner. They do not have experienced this but want to climb on the bandwagon of weaning babies early. I feel sorry for their babies because i have noticed the behavioral changes in them after weaning. Breastfeeding makes babies strong, especially breastfeeding after the 1 year mark.

Now, my daughter is 25 months, I have started the process of weaning but not that of a sudden one, but a gradual effort. I am happy seeing my daughter now, who had started talking early as compared to her peers. She is friendly, playful, considerate and does not show tantrums regularly. Sometimes I feel that this might be due to the blessing of breastfeeding.

I want her to grow up a happy human being. I have given her the gift of planned breastfeeding, which will stay with her for the rest of her life. Maybe she too might not want to wean off her baby early. She might give the same gift as mine to her baby, when the time comes. 

Make a human being out of your baby

And a fellow mommy told me that generally women who have a son as their first baby, do not plan a second child, these days. I was amused but didn't want to end up in an argument. But i am happy that there are only a few of her breed in my friend circle, at least. 

Most of my friends from school were two sisters, just like me and my sister are. Same goes with my sister. In fact, i know even those friends, who are single daughter of their parents and that too in the time of 80s. I never felt the need of a brother, ever. In fact, i started loathing those people who asked me whether i had a brother and pitied me, when the answer was negative. I am proud that we are two sisters and both are the apple of our parents' eyes. I am glad that our mother-in-laws too don't have daughters and have welcomed us like their daughters in the family. 

             "Sons do not stay with their parents 

              these days, but at least daughters do"

My mother-in-law envies my mom saying that sons do not stay with their parents these days, but at least your daughters make a point to come and stay with you for some days. This is the beauty of daughters. Every family desires that they have one, either in the form of a daughter or a daughter-in-law. 

When me and my husband were planning a baby, we kept our fingers crossed for a daughter. A daughter's a bliss in disguise. She smiles and the entire world seems to be smiling at you. When people started indicating that i might have a son, seeing my bloated belly, i was slightly depressed. In fact, after delivering, i did not even bother to ask the gender of the baby. But thank God, when somebody addressed the baby as she, that i was happy to bear all the pain. 

I am not biased towards boys because i know it all depends upon the upbringing. My parents have brought us up as independent human beings who can handle all kinds of work easily, whether travelling alone, handling finances or pitching in family discussions with ideas. I even know males (some present in our family) who handle kitchen like pros when the ladies of the house are not present. I am proud of my father-in-law, brother-in-law and even my husband who can dish up cuisines when we are not feeling well. 

It's high  time that parents understand that babies need to be made strong, empathetic, independent and loving, rather than strong-headed, opinionated, loud and selfish. I seriously wish that i insert lovely values in my little one so that she can stand on her own, when she steps out in the world.